Shame doesn’t just live in our thoughts — it lives in our relationships.
Many of us carry deep beliefs that we are too much, too sensitive, or not enough. These messages didn’t come from nowhere — they were learned through moments of rejection, criticism, neglect, or trauma. And over time, shame can become the lens through which we see ourselves — and others.
How Shame Sounds in Relationships
• “They’ll leave if they really know me.”
• “I need to earn love by being useful.”
• “If I say how I feel, I’ll be too much.”
How It Distorts Connection
Shame can make us afraid to be vulnerable. It leads us to hide our needs, apologise for our existence, or expect abandonment before it happens.
We might:
• Avoid sharing emotions out of fear of judgement
• Over-give or people-please to feel safe
• Stay in relationships that reinforce our shame
What Helps?
Healing from shame starts with being seen — not fixed. Therapy creates space to:
• Challenge shame-based beliefs
• Build new, safer experiences of connection
• Learn that needs don’t make us weak — they make us human
You’re Not Too Much
Shame says: “Hide your real self.”
But healing says: “You deserve to be seen and supported.”
You are not broken. You are learning to belong — to yourself and to others — without shame.
